About 2 weeks ago I quit Facebook. I felt that it was too much of an energy nazi. I also quit YouTube for the same reason, although I resumed that last week.
It’s always interesting to disconnect from Facebook or some other online platform you’re hooked in to. To me, it feels like childhood did. Life was more immediate and local.
Disconnecting from Facebook strips away longstanding facets of your identity and reality; revealing them to be false. Things that have unconsciously become part of your worldview, drain away like the water of a fish’s tank and only then does the fish notice that there was water there at all.
At this point, I’m struggling to remember what it was like. Very repetitive I’m sure. I recall there were some basic assumptions about the importance of liberality, looks et cetera.
Something else I remember about Facebook is that there is a sense of low value if you express yourself and don’t get many likes or comments. I don’t feel that anymore without it. I feel inherently valuable in my unique nature. I notice that the same things tend to garner likes universally. This is in my view the single greatest homogenizer of people in human history.
I can’t stand homogeneity. Adulterated culture. I want the world to contain multitudes of unique realities. It suggests endless discovery and intrigue. It seems natural and intuitive to me. It’s why I like nationalism. It’s why I hate social justice types: they bulldoze culture and free expression and replace it with this globalist ethic which is designed solely to minimise offense. It’s so damn ideological and monotonous.
I crave symbols, stories, tribes, contrast and conflict, unfiltered expression, male-female-polarity, sexuality, ambition, the thrill of the unexplored. To me, these are what colour a life with meaning. Unfortunately, they also are the meaning of tall-poppy and therefore what gets targeted for rejection in most parts of Australia. It feels like the wind gets taken out of your sails when you alone try to act out of these values.
Unexpectedly I’ve started listening to rap music again. It’s my favourite style of music but it’s been almost a decade since it’s seemed relevant to my life. I work at home and was listening to it it today as I worked, via Spotify. There’s a whole new breed of artists but the quality seems very good to me. I like that it promotes a lifestyle of fun and excitement, not thinking too much ahead, and yet self-actualisation as well.
I finished work and went for a scoot around the Yarra river boulevard. Now I’m at Sky Bar (the highest altitude bar in Melbourne, based in the Crown Casino) having a soda lime and bitters. I feel like I did in high school: judged by the community. Listening to rap music unconsciously gives you this badass edge. Swag. It doesn’t make sense but it does feel good to be gangster.
I like the way I feel on rap music. It feels isolated though. Australia is not really a place of dreaming. You can dream but the tradeoff is moral support.
Last night whilst scooting back from Mount Dandenong, I was reflecting on how limiting this culture has felt lately. So I made the decision to move to America, in theory. And when I do I will also be seeking out the people I admire such as Seth McFarlane, Owen Cook, Joe Rogan and Kanye West.